“No” is Not a Curse Word

“No” is Not a Curse Word

Prepared for:

Harlem Park Elementary School

1401 Lafayette Ave

Baltimore, Maryland 21217

19 September 2012

Prepared by:

Elder William James Carter, The 1st

© The Christian Perspective

“No” is Not a Curse Word

All too often parents work tirelessly for their families and those that surround them. But that work comes a great cost. That cost is that parents are often stressed, worn out, tired, impatient, underfed and the like. With that bad health is often not only at the door but sitting in the easy chair. When this happens parents are not good for themselves or their children. They have said yes way too often to way too many people for all the wrong reasons.

Saying yes is proper and right but not always necessary. There is no need to say yes to everybody for everything because it will have a negative impact. One impact, as noted is stress. But what is stress? There are two forms of stress; one good and the other not so much. The first form of stress is eustress which is a positive stress that provides energy for us. It is the kind of stress that is useful for creativity as well as getting us out of dangerous situations. For instance, if we are cross the street and suddenly a car comes streaming down the road we are suddenly filled with certain adrenalin that allows us to run across the street to safety.

The second type of stress is called distress. Some synonyms for distress are:

  1. Suffering
  2. Pain
  3. Anguish
  4. Greif
  5. Agony
  6. Misery
  7. Torment
  8. Affliction

This, however, is not the whole of negative stress. There is another term for negative stress which is hyperstress. Hyperstress is the compilation of a number of negative stressors which makes a person feel like there is no hope. Feelings of depression can seep in which makes the stress all the worse. Unchecked stress can:

  1. lead to emotional distress
  2. spiritual exhaustion
  3. Physical illness

Much of this stress can be alleviated if we simply learn to say “no”.  Many seem to think that saying no is a curse word. That is many see denying others their services as being an obscenity or blasphemous. It is not. Not only is it OK to say no but often it is necessary to say no. For instance; if your child wants you to buy him $200.000 pair of tennis shoes but budget not only disallows it but he just received a new pair of tennis shoes at the start of the school year. It is OK to say no if only because there is no need for them.

And then there are the neighbors. They need this and they need that. Milk is needed for the baby but the store is two blocks away and she just came from the store. And then there are other needs of neighbors that really are not needs rather they are desires that have little to no necessity. But in the mind of the one seeking your help it is not only urgent but an emergency. But you just arrived home from work and dinner needs to be prepared. You are tired and the kids need help with their homework. Not only that you have to prepare for the next day’s work. It is OK to say no. This is a small part of the picture of the working parent because there are many other aspects to their lives. This is a list of things most of us are involved in or with:

  1. God
  2. Spouse
  3. Children
  4. Self – Most often denied behind God and Church
  5. Work
  6. Church
  7. Friends and neighbors
  8. Health
  9. Security
  10. Civic duty

With all this going on it is quite easy for a life to fall out of balance. In his book Margin Dr. Richard A. Swenson outlines steps to “restore balance.”  Those steps are:

  1. Regain control over your own lives.
  2. Place God at the center of all things, and build outward from there.
  3. Beware of the trap of trying to solve the problem of imbalance by becoming even more unbalanced.
  4. Accept the No given by others.

Above all say NO when you need to and when you want to. It is OK to pamper yourself. So,

  1. Take that bath and let Calgon take you away (in my case Mr. Bubble)
  2. Watch a movie
  3. Twiddle you thumbs
  4. Take that walk
  5. Love You!

Here are 1,120 well sourced examples of Obama’s lying, lawbreaking, corruption, cronyism, hypocrisy, waste, etc.

Dan from Squirrel Hill's Blog

By Dan from Squirrel Hill

Posted on August 15, 2013. Updated on July 13, 2015.

As the author of this blog post, I place it into the public domain. Anyone may freely copy it in any part or in its entirely, without asking my permission, and without paying any money. I do ask you please cite a link to http://danfromsquirrelhill.wordpress.com/2013/08/15/obama-252/

I ask you to please show this list to as many people as possible – and especially, to please show it to as many Obama supporters as possible. Sunshine really is the best disinfectant. I can’t stop Obama from doing any of these horrible things, but I can tell people about what he is doing. So please share this list with others on Facebook, Twitter, etc. Thank you. The short link for this is http://tinyurl.com/ku9vxug

Every President, every politician, and every human being tells lies and engages in acts of…

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On Role Models

In light of what is going on with Bill Cosby I thought I’d reblog this.


There is no big secret concerning the fact that I am not a fan of sports. In fact many that know me will quickly let you know that if I never saw another football, baseball, basketball or anything of the like my life would not be moved one way or the other. This is not to say that I am not concerned about some issues that surround sports and the athletes that make sports so popular. One thing that is ever present is the idea that sports figures serve as role models for much of the country. While there is little doubt that many of these athletes are wonderful and upstanding people I am not certain that I would hold any of them to the level of role model for me or those that I so care about.

I recall not long ago I was invited to an event in…

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Freedom by Two Documents


     Looking back at history it becomes extremely evident that many of our predecessors lived under the hand of certain slavery. While not all the slavery had to do with limitations imposed by man there was certainly slavery that limited mankind. Consider for a moment the bondage Adam found himself in. His decision to disobey God placed him in rather precarious situation. On one hand he was immediately inundated with a lot of knowledge but Adam became bound by that knowledge because the realization of sin became the centerpiece of his limited understanding.

     It was always God’s desire that man be free of sin but disobedience caused man to be enslaved by sin. God would not be deterred by man’s rebellion but rather he put in place a plan that would free man from the destruction of sin. With that God used about forty men over the period of…

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